January 28, 2024

I have to tell all of you about my recent realization.

Have you ever heard the career advice you should do what you loved as a kid? And then think to yourself, that doesn't make any sense. The things I loved as a kid aren't things adults do and they certainly can't be done as work or for money.

I tried to come at career related ideas from that advice. But I'd always end up frustrated and thinking that might work for some people, but not for me. 

But recently, I was able to make some new connections. With starting this community and getting so into technology.

The thing I loved the most when I was a kid was my stuffed animals. I had over a hundred. There's a picture of me somewhere, sleeping on top of all of them. I would talk to them under the covers. I formed them into little families and friends. They were my friends and very real to me.

They were my safe place, my comfort. They'd always be there for me. I didn't have to worry about them leaving me or choosing someone else over me.

I kept all of them until I was in college. I was growing up and had to move on. There were too many to keep.

But I kept the ones who'd been with me the longest, and many of their friends and family of course. Looking back now, I still feel a pang of guilt that I didn't keep all of the families together.

I think that sense of comfort and belonging is what I'm trying to build with this community. To foster connections between people that help them feel a little safer in the world, a little more accepted and understood, and hopefully relaxed enough to have a good time with each other.

I don't know if it will ever turn into a career or make enough money to live off of, or any money at all for that matter. But I do know creating this community with all of you feels very aligned with who I really am. The little girl I left behind long ago and the adult who believes there's more magic to life than she previously could see.

I hope being a part of this community is meaningful to you. That you're starting to feel more your true self and that it's possible to share more of who you really are with others. That is what I want for all of us. To realize, to remember that we are powerful, creative, wise women who are very capable of creating the lives we want.

Thank you so much for playing with me so far. For giving me the space and time to explore this idea and my ability to actually lead. 

I've been able to come to an understanding of leading that feels good to me. I really struggled to even get this far because I didn't want to lead people, to give advice, to pretend like I know what anyone else should be doing.

I'm leading events and I'm leading myself. I'm simply inviting others along who want to join me. Who want to explore themselves, share ideas and stories, make deeper connections with others. I'm very grateful all of you decided to join in.